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Evolution of a Gamer 5: Extra Life (Classic EoG)

This is the continuation of the original Evolution of a Gamer articles posted to GoozerNation, brought over so the series can continue with new adventures. Due to the deletion of the original site, the second half of this one is lost to the ether. It's one of the series Ryan is most proud of, announcing the newest member of his family, who is now inspiring new editions of the series.

Regular followers of my articles may have noticed a lull lately; this particular column hasn't seen an update for a while, there's been a few weeks without a Fit to Game, and my little "Games worth Finding" series has been slow as well. Well, I've been busy. We have been expecting our second child for a while now, and well...he's here. :)

Heads up: this article is not for the queasy or faint of heart.

As I neared the date of delivery, I was aware of all that was to happen: my wife was guaranteed a C-section due to the size of our child; in addition, she had a 12 inch by 12 inch ovarian cyst that needed to be removed. I was supposed to be in there with her. Here is my take on blood: if it is accidental, I am okay. If it is intentional, that's when I have problems. I could see a train wreck, throw some limbs in the trunk and some people in the seats, get them to the hospital, and I'd be fine. It's when I see someone who by and large is living right now and I hear a doctor say "scalpel"....yeesh. People made fun of me on my first kid because I didn't cut the cord. I have nothing to prove.

I wanted to be in the room with my wife, but I wanted to be prepared. So, as a gamer geek, I turn to video games! Went to the totally awesome Goozex Value Bin, and picked up Trauma Center: Second Opinion for the Wii. Cheap, and an instant match got it here quick. I tooled around with it a bit; the drama was hilarious to me, but I toyed with the surgery and prepped myself. (The drama was ten times better than the Grey's Anatomy video game my wife and her friend played, though. *shudder*)

I laughed at how sketchy my sutures could be for the patient to have a full recovery. I figured in the end a little gaming would prep me, no matter how awful the realism.

The day of the surgery, I go in the room, and near my wife's head; the rest of her is on the other side of a hanging sheet. I hear them cut her open, and they marvel at the cyst. While they don't wish it on anyone, they love seeing something out of the ordinary. Suddenly, I hear the main doc say: "The cyst just ruptured!" I hear a splat, then look down to see a puddle of brownish green glop slap on the floor at my feet. Then, a trickle of red starts pooling within it. The doctors waste no time and get a little platform to put over the slop so the doctor has somewhere to stand. The doctors are speaking loud and quick; the pool is oozing, blood hits the curtain...I hear a nurse say: "He's going down!"; they are referring to me! I get my head on a pillow and breathe through it; getting color back in my cheeks. Like I said, intentional cutting... They get my son out, and usher me out of the room with him. Got to hold him a bit, but then they took him to get him ready for life. Leaving me in a room by myself. For an hour. With no understanding of how things are going. Eventually, they wheel my wife into the room, and I go get my son. Soon after, the five-year-old (of whom all the other Evolution articles have been about) comes in the room. Amazed at his new brother, he smiles proudly. It's great having a new addition to the family, and I can tell he loves him already.


Sadly, the remainder of this article was lost. I'm sure that I remember going on and discussing the hilarity of life sim games being nothing like bringing a new baby home, and how I was excited to get my new son in on the gaming one day, so his big brother could have a Player 2. And it's all happening. My youngest, now four, loves his video games just as much as his brother. It's amazing how at four, he's traversing a fully 3D Minecraft world as deftly as I played Mario 1....well...this looks like it should be it's own article. Keep on the lookout for more classic Evolution articles, as well as new ones soon!

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